She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
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