I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
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