i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
