I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Can I color on your dick again?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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