Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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