I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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