I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
