His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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