This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
