Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize