have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Randomize
