Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
My dad is sitting where you rode me
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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