But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
