you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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