You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize