actually, I'm a sock model
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Randomize
