FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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