worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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