Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
