would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Randomize
