Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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