wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
did i walk over a car last night?
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Your cock deserves a montage
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize
