Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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