There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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