whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
