When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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