she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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