i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
