I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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