am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
