I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
