Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
