Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
My ass is underappreciated
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize