so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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