Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
