His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
