Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
When are your genitals available?
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
