i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
