I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
