ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
