i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
