he wants to bone in the snuggie
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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