Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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