We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
