Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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