he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
