I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize
