I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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