his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
