I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Randomize
